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Boots from my son’s eighth grade year,
outgrown far faster than the heart-deep
humiliations he bore for being gay
that I could not protect him from.
I’ve worn them ever since through sleet and snow.
A sheepskin hat too hot for any weather
but what nor’easters scream down across fields,
one fleece edge turned so the bite
taken from it by our long dead terrier mutt
is covered by the blue wool muffler
my daughter knitted for me
one fall when unemployed and anxious.
Leggings, snow pants, and here,
I might as well confess my underwear’s
not good; it’s every day, functional,
won’t ride up which makes it perfect
for this task. Shirt, sweater, upscale
jacket passed down from a friend,
my husband’s old coat with torn pocket,
bright red gloves my mother bought
on sale before she died, and zippered
in my sleeve: chapstick and my father’s
handkerchief. All set. I’m suited up,
armored, armed with shovel and salt,
to break and keep a path for any to come home.
Hayden Saunier is a poet, actor and teaching artist living in the Philadelphia area. Her books include A Cartography of Home (Terrapin Books, 2021).
Copyright 2021 Hayden Saunier.
Hayden, your work always tugs at my heart. I love the momentary trips you take me on.
Thank you.
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There are still things I wear that belonged to my mom, my husband, my kids that spark a brief memory and longing for those who will visit eventually snd those who never will. Thank you.
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Thanks, Barb! Yes, clothing stirs our feelings and memories, doesn’t it?
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Love those last two lines: the bringing together of the sacred and the profane and how they become the same.
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I think this is such a well-made and moving poem!
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🔥
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