Vox Populi
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Alexis Rhone Fancher: Kate’s Pantoum
1.
My best friend shows up two days post mortem.
Her soul not yet departed, she sits on my bed.
The mattress gives with her weight; I feel her shadow.
When I reach for her, she’s gone.
Her soul not yet departed, Kate sits on my bed.
I ask her to stay, eat pizza, watch noir films till dawn.
She nods, but when I reach for her, she’s gone.
I need her more than I used to.
I beg her to stay for dinner, watch noir films till dawn.
Relive our past; the clothes, the sex, that tiny apartment!
I need her even more than I used to.
I want her to need me.
I’ve stockpiled good times as a buffer against grief.
The mattress gives with her weight; I feel her shadow.
I want her to need me, too.
My best friend shows up two days post mortem.
2.
These days I stumble in the dark of her demise.
I can’t find her anywhere.
If you see her, reach out. She might listen.
But her head’s in the clouds; she’s a dreamer.
I can’t find her anywhere.
I’m out of hope. Awash in sorrow, desolate.
Her head’s in the clouds; a dreamer.
Maybe she’s dreaming of me.
I’m out of hope. Awash in sorrow, desolate.
Despair, an aching hole Kate once filled.
Maybe she dreams of me.
I want to dive in. Be a part of it.
Despair, the awful hole that Kate once filled.
If you see her, reach out. She might listen to you.
I want to dive in. Be a part of her dream.
But these days I stumble in the dark.
~~~~
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Poet/photographer Alexis Rhone Fancher is published in Best American Poetry, Rattle, The American Journal of Poetry, Spillway, Plume, Diode,The Pedestal Magazine, Duende, Vox Populi, Gargoyle, Elysium Review, and elsewhere. Her photos are published worldwide. She’s authored ten poetry collections, most recently, TRIGGERED, (MacQueens) and BRAZEN. (NYQ). A coffee table book of over 100 of Alexis’ photographs of Southern California poets will be published by Moon Tide Press in early 2025. She calls the Mojave Desert home.
~~~~
Poem and image copyright 2025 Alexis Rhone Fancher
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When writing about emotionally difficult subjects, I’ve always found that form is my friend. Brava for these brave pantoums!
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I agree, Meg. Fixed forms can free the poet’s imagination.
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How marvelous this is. The repetition of the pantoum form works powerfully with the theme of loss and grief. Much in the way it did for Bishop in One Art. Beautiful work.
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True that, Micky me boy (my grandfather used to call me that).
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Grogeous pantoum and very, very moving. “I’ve stockpiled good times as a buffer against grief.”
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I like that line as well. Thank you.
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Not only did this poem move me deeply with its passionate descriptions of acute grief, but it also helped me learn about the pantoum form that here dresses grief and homage so engagingly.
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A well-made and moving poem!
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My arms around you, Alexis.
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excellent Alexis…the pantoum form holds the emotion like a grid and a support, a nd works both as a child’s verse in repetition and of course as a holy blessing for the loss. xxx, m
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I know it sounds like a contradiction in terms, but I found this poem about loss and grief to be exquisitely moving…
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Yes, the writing is beautiful.
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