Vox Populi
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Barbara Crooker: Stillbirth
Dear Supreme Court Injustices,
you who are so proud of overturning
Roe vs. Wade. Do you have any idea
what it’s like to lose a child, a wanted child,
one who never got to use her pink lungs,
take in this sweet air? And then, on the worst
day of your life, to have a criminal case
opened against you? Let me tell you how
it was: the frightened nurse who couldn’t find
a heartbeat, the attending doctor who couldn’t find
the words. He said she was whisked off to be weighed,
when really, a priest had been called to sprinkle her
with water, bless her with a handful of syllables.
Spare me your thoughts and prayers. And those
questions from a fat-bellied self-important sheriff.
I took every vitamin and iron pill, went to all the Lamaze
classes, the checkups and visits. Didn’t drink, smoke,
do drugs; watched what I ate. Now, presenting with no
heartbeat, some hospitals would turn me away;
some doctors would refuse delivery, fearful of a trial
or even jail time. Do you know what it’s like
to leave a maternity ward with empty arms? To put away
a crib, changing table, boxful of tiny garments into a closet
and close the door? This was America in the 20th century.
It happened in a country I can no longer call my own.
Barbara Crooker
Allentown, Pennsylvania
~~~
Copyright 2025 Barbara Crooker
Barbara Crooker’s books include Slow Wreckage (Grayson, 2024). Her many awards include the WB Yeats Society of New York Award, the Thomas Merton Poetry of the Sacred Award, and three Pennsylvania Council fellowships in literature.
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Such heartbreak, and fear for other mothers’ heartbreak–nowhere to go but poetry.
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My G-d Barbara, so powerful, necessary, & true Say it again & again!
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I find myself crying to often lately, but the tears lead to determination and I will repost this. I wonder if those with sanctimonious representatives can send this to them.
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Too often
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Thank you for your comments and for reposting. We’re in some dark times now but have to keep reaching for the light–
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bravo for that poem
Professor of English, Director of the Environmental Studies Minor
University of Mississippi
Please check out my website: annfisherwirth.com
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Heartbreaking. In two ways.
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Thank you, Arlene–
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Thank you for this poem. In my early twenties, with two toddlers, I lost a third child when my water broke at 3 1/2 months. Even with proper care that completed the miscarriage, I still got an infection. I am grateful that two little boys were not left motherless. And that I was able to have a third child a couple of years later.
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Thanks for sharing this painful memory.
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Oh, that’s heartbreaking, Donna. And would be even more so in today’s world in states like Florida where you would have been left to fend for yourself. . . .
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I am appalled that women are now subjected to such barbaric treatment anywhere, but in this country which was a modern country just a few years ago . . .
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The most powerful witness is from our own experiences, heart, body mind. Thanks again Barbara for your long history of observation & love of language. We are indeed kindred souls.
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Thank you Barbara for putting words to the experience of every woman who has miscarried or lost a child to stillbirth. To imagine we might be criminalized for such a painful event is a cruelty beyond imagination. Bless you for your imagination and your words.
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“Cruelty beyond imagination”–you’ve hit the nail on the proverbial head. . . .
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Thank you, Barbara, for witnessing to atrocity. The cast of players is all too real. The Handmaid’s Tale is upon us.
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But the sequel to The Handmaid’s Tale has a happy ending. Maybe it be so for us, too–
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I hope you don’t mind that I reblogged this … with tears.
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I am so glad you reblogged the poem. Everyone should read it.
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I am honored that you reblogged this. Thank you.
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tragic and beautiful, Barbara. thank you for writing this. (Carla)
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Thank you, Carla.
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Barbara:
The eloquent, hard come by language of heartbreak! So much of this awfulness we can but artfully decry. I hate it!
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Thanks, Sean. This poem shows us how the things we most care about are shaped by, if not defined by, political events. The idea that the government can deny life-saving care in order for politicians to take a sanctimonious stand is very offensive.
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Thanks, Sean. All I have is this handful of words. . . .
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