Martina Reisz Newberry: “Rachel is weeping for her children…”

Jeremiah 31:15

.

I imagine I can see 
scratched and scarred places on 
my children’s bodies. 
They are the places where I 
used to live. Look carefully 
 
and you’ll see my ghost, looking 
for the rest of my family, 
for that other life 
I thought I would have. Careless
dreams—curious larceny.
 
I read them like books, thumbing
through their pages that did not
love me—loved others—
but not the smiling, passive
woman who seemed only to React
 
instead of grabbing the bull
by its proverbial horns
(a pithy observation),
and running for those famous
hills, their little hides in tow.
 
Oh, I have been penitent
all my life— all of their lives—
far from paradise, 
further still from lenity,
landed under the spaces
 
in their memories, waving,
calling out to their bodies
“Here I am. See me.
In spite of your memories,
I am more than your laments.”

Copyright 2020 Martina Reisz Newberry. From Blues for French Roast with Chicory by Martina Reisz Newberry (Deerbrook Editions, 2020).