Driving through Pennsylvania is lovely
except for the God, Bait & Guns of it all,
except for the money and bullets behind it,
the fishing line, triggers and damnation.
Yesterday, I was culling through papers to throw out and came across a letter from my mother to her father. She’s trying to cushion the news that no one will tell him. He’s dying of cancer.
I was gazing out this morning from my perch in Bedford,
Virginia when I heard the screech of a red-
tailed hawk in the deep, cerulean sky
above a Blue Ridge mountain in which the other-
wise perfect silence was musical
I pretend I am living in a faraway
city, somewhere in Europe, where doves
coo in the bell towers and a woman in
heels click-clicks over the cobblestones,
walking, walking late into the night.
At the Saturday Pearly Balls, I conga
to the karaokes of yokels, popes, madams
& Nobels. No one wears a watch, no strike
of midnight to worry about. I’ve read all
the books & let go of the past — at last.
I would love more.
I would love better.
I would love.
Whatever you searched for
will never be found. Whatever
memories hidden in the
chest in the attic mustn’t be taken
out anymore.
That time of year thou mayst in me behold
When yellow leaves, or none, or few, do hang
Upon those boughs which shake against the cold,
Bare ruined choirs where late the sweet birds sang.
I love the way the black ants use their dead.
They carry them off like warriors on their steel
backs.
We lift weights. We
feel great. We
do yoga. We
eat granola.
Have you ever thought
that you weren’t healing
as fast as you thought
you should
The geese are calling—this is
time to depart. They gather and sink and
soar toward somewhere.
After we dropped dirt
on my father’s coffin
the long line of cars
drove back to the house.
The day you passed away, I stumbled
along icy sidewalks, searching for any
sign of you