Michael Simms: Top 10 best really terrific things about Trump becoming President

1. Most of us didn’t vote for him, so we can always claim that he’s not our fault.

2. Putin and the Russians like him. They really really like him. (What’s with that?)

3. He makes the rest of the world feel their leaders are not that bad.

4. He doesn’t understand how government works, so maybe he can’t screw things up too badly.

5. He’s seventy years old, so maybe he’ll forget where he put the nuclear codes.

6. He’s not very bright, so maybe Angela Merkel can run things when he’s not watching.

7. Melania looks better in a bikini than Bess Truman.

8. Melania doesn’t want to be co-president, she just wants to put on something skimpy and look all pouty mouth for the camera.

9. He’s already detested by the press, so there’s nowhere to go but up.

10. Elizabeth Warren can kick his ass, so he might get beat up by a girl.

10 ½. He’s not the horniest president we’ve ever had.

Copyright 2016 Michael Simms

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Donald Trump telling neighborhood kids to get off the White House lawn.