Vox Populi

Vox Populi: A Public Sphere for Politics and Poetry

Why Teachers Drink

The following questions appeared in last year’s GED examination. These are genuine answers from 18 year olds.

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Q. Name the four seasons
A.. Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar

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Q. How is dew formed
A.. The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire

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Q. What guarantees may a mortgage company insist on
A.. If you are buying a house they will insist that you are well endowed

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Q. In a democratic society, how important are elections
A.. Very important. Sex can only happen when a male gets an election

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Q. What are steroids
A. Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs

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Q… What happens to your body as you age
A.. When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental

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Q. What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty
A.. He says goodbye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery

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Q. Name a major disease associated with cigarettes
A.. Premature death

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Q. What is artificial insemination
A… When the farmer does it to the bull instead of the cow

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Q. How can you delay milk turning sour
A.. Keep it in the cow

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Q. How are the main 20 parts of the body categorized (e.g. The abdomen)

A.. The body is consisted into 3 parts – the brainium, the borax and the abdominal cavity. The brainium contains the brain, the borax contains the heart and lungs and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels: A,E,I,O,U

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Q. What is the fibula?
A.. A small lie

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Q. What does ‘varicose’ mean?
A.. Nearby

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Q. What is the most common form of birth control
A.. Most people prevent contraception by wearing a condominium.

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Q. Give the meaning of the term ‘Cesarean section’
A.. The cesarean section is a district in Rome

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Q. What is a seizure?
A.. A Roman Emperor.

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Q. What is a terminal illness
A. When you are sick at the airport

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Q. What does the word ‘benign’ mean?
A.. Benign is what you will be after you be eight

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Q. What is a turbine?
A.. Something an Arab or Shreik wears on his head. Once a Arab boy reaches puberty, he removes his diaper and wraps it around his head.

Thanks to Eva-Maria Simms for submitting this.

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One comment on “Why Teachers Drink

  1. judyt54
    October 8, 2016

    Id say at a guess a lot of folks were having a lot of fun with word play in those answers. Smart ass answers, but funny too.

    Like

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This entry was posted on November 21, 2015 by in Humor and Satire and tagged , , .
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